Self-Esteem Self-Confidence Psychology

Self-Esteem Self-Confidence Psychology

It’s a topic that concerns many people. The belief I have about myself. Do I appreciate him? I don’t appreciate him? Do I reduce him? Am I insulting him? Am I criticizing him? Am I making him feel guilty? Am I oppressive to him? If I do these things to myself, then it is certain that I do the exact same things to others. If I don’t value myself, I don’t value others. If I reduce me, I reduce you. If I offend me, I offend you. If I criticize me, I criticize you. If I feel guilty all the time, I blame you too. If I oppress, I oppress you. One cannot escape oneself. What I have in me, I will show you. Many times I even take it the opposite way. That is, I present that I value others, that I see the world with free eyes, that I am kind, that I behave in a way that shows that I care about expression and communication, that I am above the rights of the oppressed. When you see excessive expressions of support over the rights of others, be sure that the person expressing his support has exactly the opposite elements in him and when given the opportunity for power, he will become oppressive.

Self-Esteem Self-Confidence Psychology

Self-Esteem Self-Confidence Psychology – Not easy to understand

For the vast majority these are not important. People think they understand something simply because they have formed a view of the world. How is it possible for a kind person to hide aggression inside? Certainly there are kind people. Except they don’t brag about it, or try to convince you of their kindness, or cut themselves off for others. This mechanism of reversing things is the most common mechanism found in a cure. You ask a man to tell you a few words about his relationship with his parents and he says “good”. “I have a good relationship.” Not five minutes pass and “I have a good relationship” hides a bunch of (hidden) problems. I don’t believe in a man’s first words. It is natural to act defensively. He will say what we all say outside. But no one comes to therapy to talk about winds and waters. Everyone who comes for a treatment has problems. Problems such as low self-esteem. A psychological problem that does not let a person develop his skills and communicate deeply, firmly and pleasantly with other people.

Self-Esteem Self-Confidence Psychology

Self-Esteem Self-Confidence Psychology

Where is it due to? Usually in the real lack of attention from the parents. And I don’t mean in the provision of material goods for consumption. The most common question I ask the couples I see, and I ask them in an unsuspecting time, is: “right now can you think, how does your son or daughter feel where they are?” If they miss seeing you? If they are angry? If they are disappointed? If they expect something from you or if they want to see you to express their love to you? Can you think if something happened to them at school, it’s bothering them and they haven’t told you anything because they might think they’ll let you down or make you angry? I push them a little bit there. I stay on topic. I’m not leaving. Most parents today, no matter how many defenses they have, bend. They begin to see that it is difficult to answer the questions. Not because they don’t care about their children but because they are not easy to understand. Who can understand? There are things that are very difficult to understand about oneself.

How much more so when it comes to another. We should all have the opportunity for a good treatment. The world would be different. But it is difficult because there are not many healers who have worked deeply with themselves and people have defenses that prevent them from entering the process. A death or a disaster more easily sends one to therapy to begin to get in touch with one’s inner world in an effort of deep and systematic introspection through which to understand various hidden phenomena such as primary identifications with the mother (when we are infants), the love impulses of children which turn into disgust, the murders which are done by all of us in the inner world and the identifications which lead to the stabilization of a good self-image. I know that for someone who has not entered into an analytical process, these sound like words that leave and fly. But there lies the meaning of the world. So it’s one thing to say: “the rhythm of the world has changed within me” and another to live it, experience it and understand the change.

Give it meaning and understand it. A poor self-esteem is corrected. What cannot be corrected are the consequences of poor self-esteem in your life, which you will pass on to your children and they to theirs. We are all responsible for what happens in the world. This can be understood by every civilized person with conscience and moral values in this world. Not because he is guilty but because he sees that some responsibility falls on him in this life.

The process of psychotherapy requires commitment, dedication and is addressed only to those who seriously see that they need to change their lives. If you are thinking of starting this journey, please call me at 211 71 51 801 to make an appointment and let’s see together how I can help you.

Mixalis Paterakis
Psychologist Psychotherapist
University of Indianapolis University of Middlesex
Karneadou 37, Kolonaki (next to Evangelismos)
I accept by appointment
Tel: 211 7151 801
www.psychotherapy.net.gr
www.mixalispaterakis.gr

Self-Esteem Self-Confidence Psychology